I'm being stupid. I just stopped being anxious about Milly potentially messaging me (because I know it's unlikely that she will now so that's that) but I've just messaged Olly and I'm freaking out and I hate it. This tight feeling in my chest is just so awful because I'm reading so much into every message trying to figure out if he hates me or if he's trying to tell me to never talk to him again or whether he's just laughing at me about how stupid I'm being I don't know and all of these possibilities are buzzing around my head and i hate it because all I want is for it to go back to normal and for everyone to be friends again and that's never going to happen and I want to cry and ugh this is so stressful. Why did I message him? Why didn't I just leave it. Fuck.