I feel like shit. I ate too much and I just feel like I'm enormous and disgusting and I want to get rid of everything inside me and never see myself in a mirror again and I just hate myself. i hate myself so fucking much sometimes. I feel nothing else at the moment, it's just consuming me. This overwhelming feeling of uselessness and hatred for my body and my conviction and my life. Everything around me is muted and blurry and the only thing I know clearly right now is just how unpleasant I am. I'm toxic to myself and I'm toxic to the people I care about. I ruined Mani's evening just like I've ruined myself forever.
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