I don't want to sound cliche but also I think we had a "breakthrough" of sorts in session today - I don't trust myself. I don't trust myself to do much of anything so I'm indecisive and don't make decisions and leave other people to make decisions and let myself be swayed very easily against my better judgement because I think other people must know better than me and I obviously can't make the right choice until I've made a choice that I know is the wrong one and can't undo and can't defend myself against because in the end, despite being encouraged and advised by others, I'm the one who made it too and then that comes back to bite me most of the time and I blame myself and the cycle continues. If I was more trusting of my own decision making maybe none of this would have happened.

I know I can't dwell in the past so I will use this knowledge going forwards. Instead of continuing to shy away from making decisions I should actually make them. According to my morals and rational. Because actually it's quite good, if only I acted on it instead of letting other people convince me of their morals and rational instead. 

This is something I definitely need to ponder on more. 

Over and out, 

Gloves.